(Authors Note: A short poem about a dismissive phrase I've heard a few times, sometimes from well-meaning people.)
Get over it:
three of the ugliest words I have heard,
spoken only by those who cannot hear the heart.
I first heard it from a preacher.
I forget the context.
But I never trusted him with my heart.
I remember my first stitches.
I was three years old.
My mom didn’t tell me to get over it.
Instead, she calmed me
and comforted me
and distracted me
while the doctor sewed the stitches.
I grew up with domestic violence in the home.
Some have told me to get over it or to just forgive.
But the faulty foundation will not just go away.
I must dismantle and rebuild.
This takes time and energy and grief.
I will not just get over it.
I will face the ugly truth with integrity.
I will walk through the agony, not bypass it.
I was betrayed by toxic theologians.
I thought they were my friends.
But when I stood my ground on one issue,
they attacked and condemned and cast me out.
They violated my trust.
I lost my entire social circle.
I will not just get over it.
I will process the pain and grow through it.
And I will exercise care in who I trust.
I lost my brother,
my one remaining sibling,
to suicide –
an incomprehensible decision.
I will not just get over it.
I love him too much for that.
I will mourn him.
I will honor him.
I will hold him in my heart.
I will not rush the process.
I will not pretend.
I will not forget.
When someone says, “Get over it”,
this is what I hear:
I don’t want to hear about it.
I will not walk with you through your trauma.
I want you to protect me from your grief.
I want you to play fantasyland with me.
You must conform to my expectations
and pretend that nothing in life troubles you.
Absolutely not!
I will not play make-believe games.
I will not protect illusions.
I will struggle forward and grow.
I will face the monsters.
I will not sidestep reality.
I will not shrink.
I will take the next step forward.
I will practice emotional integrity.
I will honor truth in my heart.
– Healing Heart Warrior (Tom M.)
Get Over It?
by Tom M. | Oct 15, 2024 | ACA And The Arts, ComLine
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Tom M., Abdul A., Adarsha A, Adsiz Y Ç., Alaska Y., Alex B., Alexandra & Eira, Alexandra E, Alexandra P., Alison S., Allison H., Anastasia S., Moscow, Andy R., Angela L., Anna K., Annie D., Annie M., Anonymous, Ashley B., Barbara B., Basma H., Berlinda C., Bill D., Bonnie M, Brad H., Brad P., Carlos L., Celeste S., CG, Charile H, Chaz B., Cheryl F., Chris J., Chris M., Christie P., Christine B, Christine L., Christine O., Cindy D., Clara P., Clara T., Clara T. and Boaz, Colette B., Dan S., Dave H., Dave@Pancho H., David K., Dawn G., Deb B., Debra L., Denise R., DESC Subcommittee, Diane F., Dianne B, Drew D., Ela M., Erin D., Esraa S., Fellow Traveler, Fernando T., Gail W., Galaxy Z, Geneviève R., Global Members of ACA, Gretchen W., Haley R., Hara H., Harper O., Heather C., Hodaya B., Ifechukwu O., Imeri E., Jane F., Jay K., Jean N, Jeannie T., Jennifer L., Jennifer M., Jess P., Jill O., Jim R., Joanne B., Jon F., Josh J., Julia H, Julie N., Justine F., Kara O., Karie W., Kathleen C., Kathleen O., Kathleen S., Kathy O., Katrina W., Kaz S., Kendra N., Kristen B, Kristopher S., Lara O., Lauren K., Leah W., Lena L, Lexi I., Linda G., Lindsay P., Lisa L, Literature Committee, Lori N., Makari R., Margo T., Mari V., Marion M, Martin A., Mary H., Maura T., Melanie B., Michael H, Michell B.C., Micki F., Midge G., Mike S., Minuete C., Miriam C., Mona O., Monique J, Nancy A., Olivia M., Omid J., Oroki R., Pamela M., Paul P., Rae M., Raya V., Rena Z., Renita E., Rosalie M., Sam P., Sandee B., Sara Z., Saskia S, Sean H., Shanna D., Shannon M., Sivan H., SkyHeart, Stephen G., Sue L., Sue V, Sunil A, Susanne, Susanne R., Suzi B., Tamara P., Tamara P., The Safety Resources Committee, Thom L., Tobach N., Tom P., Toni P., Vee B., Veronica A., Will C., Wjoe H, WSO Announcements, WSO Ballot Prep Committee, WSO Finance Committee, WSO Literature Committee, WSO Volunteer Resource Committee, Yvonne de H, Yvonne W.Submission Policy
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