Asking requires a voice
Confidence to use it
And fearlessness
A form of self-awareness
And courage
Vulnerability and self-discovery
Hope
Faith
And Trust
Frightening and unfamiliar
Surreal and foreign
Who can I trust?
I don't know how to trust myself
Let alone anyone else
Control will allow me to do it my way
Of course, the ego states I know what is best
Asking opens the door for rejection or projection
Scary.....
"Do it yourself because people are not reliable"
"Don't talk"
"Don't trust"
“Don't feel"
"Do as you are told"
" You are old enough to figure it out"
Why would I ever ask?
The training is embedded in my entire body
Helping equated to hurt
I'd rather stay isolated
That was then.....
Link to Recovery:
Grace and gentleness shows me what I learned I practiced. I was groomed to isolate and have a very low value of self-worth and esteem. Trust was non-existent. Asking for assistance requires a level of trust. I do not trust myself or others, including my Highest Power. Asking a question was against the "rules". The old rules, that is!!!! F*** those rules!!!
Tamara P
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