"Shame blinds us to the fact that love is inside each of us waiting to be discovered." BRB p. 168
We are often broken when we come to ACA. Through denial, we don't even know what we don't know. It takes time to realize how badly bruised (emotionally and sometimes physically) we were as kids. Shame ruined our sense of self. We had a self when we were born, but it was chipped away day after day until we seemed to be in shreds. There was little left but the reflection of our parents' hateful and frightening words and actions.
Some of us may have felt confused when we started recovery as we were told to reach inside for our selfworth. We didn't know that we had any and we doubted ourselves at every turn. Even though we felt hopeless, we hung onto the words we heard in the meetings. We saw others recovering and it felt hopeful. It helped to read the literature on a daily basis, and eventually we felt a shift happening.
We continued our Step work, going to meetings, relying on a Higher Power and reaching our Inner Child. We began to truly see our value. No longer defined by the shaming voices of the past, we had a new image of ourselves - a true image of the valuable person we always were.
On this day I look at myself through the eyes of recovery, not through the eyes of my caretakers from childhood. I see the love inside me that continues to grow.
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of Alcoholics / Dysfunctional Families
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