"Humility comes from God and is a sibling of anonymity, a foundational principle of the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions. Through anonymity, we practice service with love." BRB p. 223
In our families, humility and humiliation often got confused and led us to either become very passive, aggressive, or passive-aggressive. In working the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, we are given a different definition of humility. In ACA, humility is about being the one we were supposed to be before our families infected us with their dysfunction and before we recycled that dysfunction in our own lives. It is about being our True Selves.
Anonymity is naturally confused with our alcoholic/ dysfunctional family's desire to keep secrets. The difference is that in ACA, we don't share what others say or tell who was at our meetings as a way of giving security to each other. Knowing this allows us to feel safe to share our own story. When we are tempted to judge, ridicule, or speak of someone else, we are reminded that through the practice of protecting the anonymity and confidences of our fellow ACAs, we now have a higher purpose, a healthy limit that gives life rather than diminishes it.
The possibility of performing service in ACA flows powerfully from our understanding of these principles in our lives. The newcomer feels it, the old-timer appreciates it, and our Higher Power loves it.
On this day, love for my fellow ACAs, humility, and anonymity will provide me with a positive motivation for the service I may choose to give to ACA.
Copyright © 2018 by Adult Children
of Alcoholics / Dysfunctional Families
World Service Organization, Inc.
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