"In ACA we look at our parents' behavior, family roles, rules, messages, abuse, neglect, and how that affects us as adults. We balance the inventory of our family system with a thorough inventory of our own behavior." BRB p. 109

Step Four may be the first time many of us tell our whole story to someone else. This is a remarkable event, one that leaves us with a sense of wholeness we have never experienced before. The idea we may have been carrying around, that we were unlovable, is now slowly melting away.

One of the wonderful things about ACA is that our Fourth Step inventory helps us understand where we truly came from and who we're becoming. We accept all of what we were given so that we can decide what to keep. When we take our inventory we make it balanced, recognizing that we are now making our own choices; we are no longer blindly accepting what others have implanted in our minds. We don't have to carry all the abuse and neglect that were passed down to us generationally.

The balance we learn allows us to see where we need to go. We continue to keep the focus on ourselves and change what we can. We no longer look for temporary solutions to life's problems.

On this day I will trust my direction. I have begun to see more clearly that this new path I walk will give me the freedom I deserve.