"Red flags that warn that a bottom or relapse is coming involve: dropping out of meetings and isolating; being argumentative or unreasonable; gossiping; losing focus and returning to one of the family roles of hero, lost child, or mascot; general noncommitment to recovery; avoiding the Steps and intellectualizing; failing to give service to ACA; binging on sex, drugs, food, or other compulsive behaviors; and acting with perfectionism and failing to talk about feelings and critical inner messages." BRB p. 70
ACA deals with deep attitudes and behaviors that sometimes are difficult to stay conscious of. Sure, the blaring ones are easy to recognize and to admit into our consciousness. But others lie beneath multiple layers of self-deception or socially-celebrated attributes.
When we miss meetings on a consistent basis, it may seem like a way of avoiding unwanted pain and disappointment. But it also provides the opportunity for our critical parent to distract us from our healing journey. This false self is masterful at finding ways to avoid doing the work that gives us a lifeline of hope.
In ACA, one way that keeps us coming back is to give service from a space of love. This is a sure-fire way of keeping ourselves tuned into our True Selves and our inner loving parent, which leads to taking care of our Inner Child. By having consistent check-ins with ourselves, we can stay focused on what is right with our program and how to best help fellow ACAs begin their recovery process.
On this day I will give service to my ACA group as a way of staying conscious and focused on my recovery process.
Copyright © 2018 by Adult Children
of Alcoholics / Dysfunctional Families
World Service Organization, Inc.
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