Fear of Authority
"We came to see our parents as authority figures who could not be trusted." BRB p. 11
In healthy families, authority figures are parents who are loving, nurturing and supportive. In our families, they usually put fear into our little souls. We endured physical, verbal or emotional abuse. And unfortunately, what we see and experience, many of us learn, and often practice. No wonder our relationships may be chaotic at best when we get to ACA, whether we had become a rigid authority figure or not.
When we admit that the only way we know how to deal with life's challenges is to slam doors, shut down and isolate, or say hurtful things to those closest to us, we take the first step towards being ready to change.
By working the Steps with a sponsor or fellow traveler, we discover the triggers that cause us to react negatively or to isolate. We cry for our little kid who faced the terror and heartbreak when these triggers were implanted. Wounds are reopened as we discover the damage, knowing we often couldn't trust what was going to happen from one minute to the next.
As we sit in meetings, we listen to the experience, strength and hope of other ACAs because they have what we want. We are tired of running - we want healthier ways to communicate so we can trust ourselves and be trusted by others.
On this day I open my heart with courage to find help to work the Steps. I love myself enough to do this.
Copyright © 2013 by
Adult Children of Alcoholics®
& Dysfunctional Families
World Service Organization, Inc.
Page Number 79
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