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REPEATING PATTERN (CHILDHOOD)

REPEATING PATTERN (CHILDHOOD)

Exploding daddy-Monster.Frozen terror within.Repeat the cycle again.Living with a volcano.Frozen terror within.When will it erupt again?Living with a volcano.I hate the volcano.When will it erupt again?Impossible to predict.I hate the volcano.Mom gets drunk...
There’s No Place Like No Peace At Home

There’s No Place Like No Peace At Home

My first memory of daddy-Monster: I’m three years old; he beats me as I lie in bed. There’s no place like screaming myself to sleep. Daddy-Monster locks me in the scary basement when I’m four or five. There’s no place like knowing I’m safer behind a...
Shotgun Wedding

Shotgun Wedding

I study an old photograph from sixty-five years ago.My parents are cutting their wedding cake.I see Mom, three months pregnant, scared and uncertain, younger than her appearance.I see daddy-Monster, arrogant and dominant, younger than his appearance, with a predatory...
Grief Work

Grief Work

I've been in ACA since April 2021. Since this past January, I've been incarcerated as a Federal inmate in a low-security prison for a sex crime I felt I was powerless to avoid. Those words are in our BRB - "Some ACA's are in prison for the rest of their lives for a...
The Healing Adult And The Child Within

The Healing Adult And The Child Within

The maimed child within:terrified,paralyzed with fear.Forced to trust daddy-Monsterwho’s unstable and dangerous –unpredictably explosive.Forced to trust bitter battered mom,who gave him birth,who’s drunk,slurring her speech,unable/unwilling to protect herselfor her...
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