Daily Meditation

 "The healing begins when we risk moving out of isolation. Feelings and buried memories will return." BRB p. 590

Did it really happen? Did it happen the way I remember? Am I crazy or are they?

Some of us have few memories of our childhood because of the trauma we experienced. As a result, we may question what we do remember, or even why we feel the way we do when we can't attach specific memories to the feelings. But our body knows something happened because it stores our trauma from both physical and emotional abuse.

As we move out of isolation into recovery, one of the first things we learn to recognize and honor is our feelings. By continuing to talk to and trust the people in our groups, and often a therapist, we gradually gain clarity. The buried memories start to return. Even when they don't, we honor our instincts when we realize we feel unsafe around family members and others. We don't question ourselves. We honor our feeling, knowing that it is real and that we're not crazy. And we take steps to keep ourselves safe.

On this day I will trust my instincts and feelings, even if I can't attach a reason for them that will satisfy others.