July 24
Indecision
"Children of alcoholics are paralyzed by indecision when trying to separate emotionally from their homes." BRB p. 87
When we started telling our story in ACA, we may have felt like we were betraying everything we had ever known, and we were - but that was okay. Part of recovery is releasing ourselves from the emotional chaos of our family of origin by rebelling, getting mad, and walking out, saying, "I'm not gonna take this anymore."
We are reparenting ourselves when we detach from our abusers and take responsibility for our own actions. We learn to share what really happened to us with fellow travelers and in meetings. We continue to heal when more memories surface and we work through them. We take care of ourselves by journaling, exercising, and learning to eat healthier.
We may still be paralyzed with indecision at times, but we allow our healed parts to nurture the parts that are still sick and wounded - they show up for each other. We rely on those with more recovery to mentor us by observing how they manage times of stress and peace. We walk towards freedom.
On this day I will make forward movement, even when I am afraid of the consequences. I now have a healthy support system that I know will be there for me, including my inner loving parent.
Copyright © 2013 by
Adult Children of Alcoholics®
& Dysfunctional Families
World Service Organization, Inc.
Page Number 213
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