"We start with the premise that we are whole and that we had a normal reaction to an abnormal situation of being raised in a dysfunctional home. Our normal reaction to protect ourselves has created survival traits, compulsions, and self-harming behaviors, which respond to the ACA Steps and spiritual remedies." BRB p. 143
When we hear we are whole at our core, we wonder, "If this is true, why do I feel so unworthy or defective? Why can't I seem to live from the truth of my wholeness?" The ACA recovery program brilliantly, gently and progressively unravels this dilemma and gradually returns us to our birthright of being whole, of being our True Self.
As we apply the program in our lives and awaken, step by step, to our True Self, we start to feel compassion for all the dysfunctions we used to judge and feel ashamed of. "Of course," we say, "it's completely understandable that I reacted the way I did." We cut ourselves some slack and feel mercy for ourselves. We did the best we could under the circumstances.
It's totally "normal" that we reacted the way we did to the dysfunctional conditions in our upbringing. It's not our fault. We were powerless. We coped as best we could by developing survival traits, compulsions and selfharming behaviors. We weren't bad or wrong for doing that. As we practice the Steps and reparent ourselves with our Higher Power's solution, we forgive ourselves for our shortcomings and reclaim our birthright to wholeness.
On this day I will feel compassion for myself, recognizing that my dysfunctional reactions were "normal" - I did the best I could.
Copyright © 2018 by Adult Children
of Alcoholics / Dysfunctional Families
World Service Organization, Inc.
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