"Authority figures scare us and we feel afraid when we need to talk to them." BRB p. 417
As children we may have been terrified to voice a thought about anything to the authority figures in our lives. We learned to keep quiet because we usually didn't know what reaction we might get.
As adults, we may still have found ourselves reacting to authority in the same manner, whether it was in a work environment or even a social group or organization that resembled a workplace structure or purpose. We may have tried to avoid authority figures, but they're everywhere. Being self-employed didn't insulate us from these interactions, either.
Even in ACA, some of us place others in roles of authority where we find ourselves recreating our family structure. But recovery is where we can become aware of our reactions and practice new ways of acting. Before we talk to an authority figure, we can stop and perform a reality check. Are we imagining the worst? Is this person going to respond like my dysfunctional parent did years ago?
If we are fearful, a very successful technique many of us use is to write a script and role-play with a trusted friend. As part of this process, we give ourselves plenty of affirmations. Growth happens when we find that the more we actually do talk to authority figures, the more our confidence increases. At last we begin to see ourselves as recovering adults, not fearful children.
On this day I will use my recovery wisdom and strength as I interact with authority figures. I am no longer frozen by fear.
Copyright © 2013 by
Adult Children of Alcoholics®
& Dysfunctional Families
World Service Organization, Inc.
Page Number 42