Depression

Depression, you’ve got me
I’m here but I’m not

Go to work, pay the bills
Care for the kids, clean the house

Except when alone, slovenly
Clothes on the floor
Dishes strewn on counters
Shoes blocking walkways
Netflix for hours

I should go outside
I should exercise
I should go to a meeting
I should call a friend

But I have no obligations
Stay home, be “free”

A.K.A. avoid my thoughts

Depression you had me
I’m here and I’d like to stay

This time I go to work and come home
Even though the house is empty
No kids to care for but I clean for me
Dishes in the dishwasher, pathways clear
Only one show at a time

I go outside, notice the sunset
Move my body to music, dance
I sew and stop when I’m tired
Read, nap, call my sister

I make plans for the future
I have hope
I take care of me
Because I’m worth it

Depression, you don’t have me anymore
I’m here
I’m here

Melanie B