My childhood home in small-town North Dakota was defined by violence, drunkenness, and severe emotional isolation. The first event I remember occurred when I was five. I tried to protect my mother from my father, and he pushed me away hard. Something in me snapped; I...
My dad was an alcoholic and a chaotically explosive Army man who had served two tours in Vietnam. Sitting at dinner, you never knew when he might erupt. One night, when I was 12, I was talking about my sixth-grade teacher, whom I loved. My dad started making fun of...
God, Help me to let go of the pain of yesterday, so the child within me may be free. Help me take ownership of my healing today, so I may grow into the adult I was meant to be. Help guide me in my steps, so that the cycle may end with me. Omnam.
I can’t possibly make up for what you lost. Moments, opportunities, and time. Just gone. Protecting you with fear. That I played on repeat. I kept you locked away, so desperately you looked for another to love you. When I couldn’t. It took me so long to see you. To...
I am afraid of taking off the armour I have so carefully crafted over the years. I am afraid of not numbing my mind, of not creating dense layers of fog that keep me from seeing through the eyes of the soul. I am afraid of facing the abyss that might appear before me...
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