Informed Consent

Having rights means I get to choose, but I am not born capable! I am, as a member of this species, born only partially developed—immature. In Step Twelve, my aim, my stage of development, is communicating (after/as becoming capable).

I practice these principles means just that: practice.

I try out strategies I’ve developed and am continuing to refine and apply—to what’s on the table in the settings I encounter, one day at a time. In recovery meetings, what’s on the table are topics related to problem-solving: the effects of dysfunctional adverse experiences—addictions, triggered reactions, isolation, anger, and fear. The key to being comfortable in Step Twelve discussions is the idea of practicing. In 12-Step programs, it is okay to admit what is true: I can admit I started out confused, bubbling over like a fountain full of question! It is acceptable to admit I am not a guru or avatar—in service and in life!

The idea, “I can be capable!”, is what motivates me as a baby seeking to be parented. The Steps are a parenting-reparenting method. They are an approach that, if applied and shared in groups, models how individuals achieve the capacity for spiritual sobriety, (I.e., the ability to reflect, think things through, and make Informed choices—instead of behaving like a robot, more or less)! These sanity and clarity tools got left out (or bent) in my initial parenting experiences—so recovery is adding them back in.

I can and do get capable. Human beings mature, not just physically. The ability to exercise choice, make decisions, have standards—these mental capacities develop and mature, too. In recovery, through practice of the Steps, I find and build solutions to life problems, not just for myself, but for my fellow-travelers, too.

Do I just repeat the same routines over and over? I may—if these work to keep me comfortable and content. That’s called, gradual progress! But in sharing how I am seeing it in fellowship, I also receive feedback. Group consciences are as good as their shared mature diversity can tolerate. If I as an individual stay an individual who works the Steps today, a Power Accessible to Me showers me with wisdom—A rainbows’ gentle light glows from willingness within me. I build the capacity to trust in me by staying open-minded and speaking truth within this fellowship.

Kathleen S.