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INACCESSIBLE SERENITY

INACCESSIBLE SERENITY

When I first discovered the 12 Steps in AA, at the age of 36, I also discovered how much I used to ruminate an obsession of some kind, as a survival trait. Even when alcohol abstinence had become easy, I was still very suicidal, and I needed to channel my mind. Later,...
Sortir du marécage

Sortir du marécage

On m’avait fait gober que j’étais handicapée psychique, porteuse d’une maladie mentale d’origine génétique. En vrai, l’origine de mes symptômes n’était pas dans les gènes, mais bien dans la gêne. La honte. Le marécage familial, où la tolérance à l’abus est telle qu’on...
How Are You?

How Are You?

“Good!” I feel the need to summarize. “Good!” The exclamation point is to create interest without divulging anything. I do not plan to give any info. I do not plan to offer any details. This is due to an assumption that the other person is not actually interested. Or...
Gated

Gated

There is a fine line in the sandWalking a tightropeLearning to juggle one egg at a timeWalking on a frozen riverBeing aware of the delicate waterThe faded line on the beachIt sometimes can move from the waves washing ashoreI can forget where the line wasSlowly dipping...
Grief and Childhood

Grief and Childhood

"Genuine grieving for our childhood ends our morbid fascination with the past and lets us return to the present, free to live as adults." - Big Red Book, page 83.My morbid fascination with my past perfectly describes the dissociative state I was in when I compulsively...
The Ex

The Ex

This writing is from the point of view of the ex-husband, with the twist of some of the descriptions coming from what I have learned in recovery. It describes some of the thinking processes involved in this dysfunctional marriage and family. Handed down from...
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